A Year in Titles

After an extremely long hiatus I’ve decided to streamline my return to the world of blogging by presenting to you a list of potential book or newspaper article titles that are representative of my year in San Francisco.

Without further ado…

• Weekends; An Overrated Pastime 
• Thursdays – The New Saturday
•  My social life – A Thing of the Past
•  My Roommate, My Cousin, My Co-Homeowner (will consider abbreviating to “Co-Homo” if short for space on the book cover)
•  Scootering Vol 1: A Time for Introspection
• Scootering Vol 2: A Series of Near Misses
• Scootering (Vol 2, Ch 1): What to Do if You’ve Just Accidentally Gotten on the Freeway
•  Neighborhood Profiles; Judy Wong of Wong’s Cleaners
• The Pros and Cons of Having an In-House Band
• Band Management 101
• DST,* It’s Just Not For Me
• Teleportation: No Longer a Thing of the Past
• SMU*; an Expose in Two Acts
• Tracy Chase; the Erin Brokovich of SMU
• Becoming a Successful Tutor (OR, How I Force Underclassmen to Listen to my 35 Minute Diatribe Regarding My Issues with the “Administration”)
• Nursing school; 12 Months Seems Excessive…Let’s Get This Done in Three
• The 3 Month ANA Accredited Accelerated BSN Program; A Proposal
• Conversations Between Kelly and Dawn*: An Observational Reflection
• One Point Away from an A: My Downward Spiral
• Become a Morning Person in 12 Steps or Less
• Accepting That You’re Not a Morning Person and Moving On
• Cereal: Telltale Signs That You’ve Had Too Many Bowls
• Cereal: The Essential Vitamin
• Tanka Dogs: The Essential Mineral
• It’s Sushi Time! (Co-authored by Annie Maxwell)
• Hipsters: Enough is Enough
• Hipsters: The Fixie Bike That Broke the Trex’s Back
• Fixie Bikes: Best to Just Call it a Single Speed
• The Squirt Fashioned; A new take on an old drink
• What to do When Lent Gets in the Way of Your Alcoholism and Sugar Addiction
• Sugar Addiction: What’s Not to Like?
• Uncle Judy Comes for a Visit
• Citizens Against People Pooping in the Middle of the Sidewalk
• A Visit Home  (Alternate Title: Vacationing in the RV in My Mom’s Driveway)
• Trans Pacific Relationships: Do’s and Don’ts
• In-flight Seizures: An Economically Sound Way to Upgrade to Business Class During Long-Haul International Flights
• Big Choices, New Directions; Searching for Employment during an Economic Recession (written under the pseudonym Stella Chase)
• Getting Yourself Noticed: The Art of Using Glitter and Scented Perfume on Résumés and Research Posters
• My Time of Personal Growth and Transformation in the Foggy City (also by Stella Chase)

*DST: Daylight Savings Time

*SMU: Stupid Moronic University

*Imaginary nursing school friends

If anyone is interested in publishing one of these titles, please contact my agent, Stella B. Chase.

Thank you for your time and cooperation!